Of My Heart
by PrinceRoxas
Summary: On the surface N and Touya are merely rivals but their relationship is much more than that. "It's complicated," they will answer when asked. No one can understand, no one can know. "Let's meet in Undella Town," N says during a secret meeting. "For one whole week, I will be completely yours." Lots of fluff and a few deviants from the game's storyline. Rating may change later on.
1. Chapter 1

It was near the end of spring, right when you could feel the warmth of summer starting to pick up in the wind. Touya had been traveling the Unova region for almost a year now. The demonstrations of Team Plasma were really beginning to unsettle the people and Touya was not exempt from their influence. Much of what they said, what Ghetsis said made sense to Touya but he could not see living without his trusted Pokemon. But despite these thoughts there was one whose words really struck at his heart.

Touya was leaving Nuvema Town after a visit with Professor Juniper when he got a buzz on his Xtransreceiver. He opened it up to answer but the screen was blank with static. Touya frowned a bit, wondering who had called. Someone had been trying to contact him but had hung up right before he answered. He shrugged and continued walking, now a good distance from his hometown. He could have flown if he'd wanted to, but Accumula Town wasn't very far and besides, he felt like walking.

The grass was tall around his ankles as he walked, making sure to be cautious lest a wild Pokemon jump out at him. This route wasn't particularly hilly so Touya could see the tall apartment buildings of Accumula off in the distance. His Xtransreceiver went off again then suddenly stopped after a couple rings. Touya stared at it when it started to ring yet again. He answered it, this time getting it to pick up on the other end. However, the screen was black.

"Hello?" he asked. "Hello?"

Touya got only silence on the other end. He hung up and continued to walk when it started ringing again. He answered and got the same thing. He was beginning to get frustrated at the prank calls. He had better things to do with his time other than entertain some person's childish whim. He did wonder who was calling him, since he didn't recognize the number. He tried to remember if he'd given his number to anyone recently and nothing came to mind.

Luckily, Accumula was just in sight. But as he was arriving, he noticed that most of the townsfolk were gathered in the town square. He came closer and saw why they were gathered. Team Plasma was giving another demonstration. Ghetsis himself was heading this one, a rare sight these days. Touya found himself stopping in the back of the crowd to listen in

"…it is as much for the Pokemon's sake as it is your own that we live separately and divide our ways. You must release your partners and allow them to live as they naturally would, free and in the wild…"

Ghetsis stood before the gathered crowd, his words ones Touya had heard many times before. His words were cheap and empty but they were getting their desired effect. Many of the people in the crowd were becoming uncomfortable and muttering to each other. Ghetsis' words left Touya unfazed however. They weren't the same as that one's speeches, the passion and the drive wherein lacking here. That one whom he hadn't seen in months. That one who he…

A warm hand slipped itself into his, fingers curling delicately around his own. Touya gave a start at the sudden touch and looked up. His eyes widened a bit.

"Hello Touya," said a tall green haired young man. He smiled and squeezed Touya's hand a little bit. "It's been a while."

Touya stood there like an idiot with his mouth hanging open. He stared up at N, who stood at least another head taller. N continued to smile at him, enjoying the shocked look on Touya's face.

"What's the matter? Don't recognize me anymore?" N said teasingly.

Touya's mouth snapped shut. "As if I'd forget you," he replied with a smirk. "But give me a bit of head warning before you disappear again."

"Aww, but then I wouldn't get to see your surprised face when I show up again," N said, giving a fake pout. "Besides, I did let you know."

"What? You never-,"

N cut Touya off with a small wave of his free hand. He was watching Ghetsis give his speech with a careful eye. "Come on. Let's go somewhere a bit more quiet and private."

He started to tug on Touya's hand and lead him away from the throng of people. Accumula was a small town, so there really weren't many places that were private. Touya followed N to the edge of town where a long set of stairs lead down to a courtyard and an apartment building. The building was built right up against the tall retaining wall, giving plenty of shelter. The wall curved slightly and once the two of them were on the other side of this said bend, N swept Touya up in a hug and kissed him.

"Mhhmm! N-not here, someone will see us!" Touya protested, pulling back from N's kiss.

"No one can see us down here unless they look straight down." He wrapped his arms around Touya's narrow shoulders and drew him in closer. "I've missed you."

Touya flushed and proceeded to bury his face in N's white shirt. He curled his arms around N's waist. "…I missed you too," he mumbled.

N slipped off Touya's baseball cap and fluffed his brown hair, a habit he'd formed shortly after they'd met. "I know…but I had to keep some face. I can't afford to be seen with you like this, you know that."

"But I hate being apart from you like this!" Touya stated. "It's not fair!"

"I know," N repeated. "It pains me too to not see you." He parted Touya's bangs and kissed his forehead. "But it makes it all the sweeter when I do get to see you again."

"Mmmhmmm…" Touya was enjoying being close to N again, being able to smell him, feel him breathe. It made him feel calm hearing N's heart beat steadily against his ear.

"I'll try harder next time," N said quietly. "For your sake."

Touya harrumphed and leaned back to look at N's face. It was still as sad as he remembered; eyes filled with conflict yet jaw set with such firm convictions. He knew the turmoil it put N in to have such feelings for Touya. N had never trusted people until Touya came along. He was the first one he'd ever opened up to.

"You'd better," he said, reaching up on his toes to kiss N's lips.

N just smiled at him again and gently returned the kiss. Touya always enjoyed the salty sweetness of N's lips when they kissed. It'd been far too long since he'd had that luxury and he was going to savor every moment of it. He gave another kiss a bit more force, opening up his mouth more to sample more of N's flavor. N didn't hesitate nor falter in his stride; he seemed to be content with giving Touya what he wanted.

N's hands came up to cradle Touya's face as he continued to bestow tender expressions of adoration on him. Touya's arms were still coiled around N's waist and they instinctively drew his body in closer. He was beginning to lose himself in the gentleness of the one he'd missed for so long. N finally pulled away and Touya made a noise of disappointment. N shook his head.

"I'm sorry Touya. I want to continue too, but Ghetsis is almost done with his speech. When he leaves, I must too."

Touya frowned. "No! I don't want you to go!"

"Neither do I," N replied softly, giving him another appeasing kiss. "But you're being selfish."

"So what if I am?" Touya was getting flustered as his emotions started running high. "It's not…fair…why do we have to be on opposite sides like this? I don't want you to leave me again…"

N stroked the top of Touya's head to comfort him, leaving the silence between them to speak. He could hear Touya forcing back tears, unwilling to show a moment of weakness.

"Two weeks from now," N stated after a few minutes of stifled sobs from Touya. The other boy looked up, confused.

"Huh?"

"When you can see me next," N continued, looking down at him. "I have a villa I rent in the summer in Undella Town. Meet me there two weeks from now and I promise you'll have me all to yourself."

"Undella Town? But…that's so far from here…"

"Then the promise of seeing me there will be your drive," N said. He gave Touya one last kiss and a hug. "I have to go now. Remember; two weeks and I'm all yours."

Touya reluctantly let go of N and stepped back. The taller youth fluffed his hair once more before heading back up the stairs. He paused however halfway up and turned back to Touya.

"Oh yeah, I'm sorry about the hang up calls. I've never worked one before so I kept fumbling with it."

N quickly turned and ran up the rest of the stairs. Touya had to think on his comment and then remembered the strange calls from his Xtransreceiver. He smiled and giggled a bit at N's embarrassment. But once that was gone, he was left alone with nothing but his thoughts and the lingering tingle of N's lips on his own. He could hear the crowd above beginning to disperse.

"Two weeks…yeah…I can wait two weeks…"

Touya replaced his hat and adjusted his backpack, a new fire burning in his eyes. Undella Town was on the other side of the Unova region, easily a fortnight's journey. N would be there, waiting for him. Touya swallowed, the thoughts of what they might do there making him blush.

He'd fallen in love with the enemy and he was not ashamed of it. He and N were destined to fight to the bitter end as rivals. And yet they had found comfort in each other's differences. If he and N could find common ground and even attraction, then maybe the others of Team Plasma could too.

Touya started back up the stairs and after a quick respite at the town's Pokemon Center, started off towards Undella Town all the while thinking of his N.


	2. Chapter 2

In his year traveling across Unova, Touya had only been to Undella Town once and it was in the middle of winter. He didn't remember much of the town, only that which he'd heard told him it was a resort for the rich. He wondered just how much money N had if he could rent a villa for the entire summer there.

He'd been traveling as leisurely as he could, mostly because he was trying to force himself to go at a slower pace. If he'd been left to his own devices without the aid of willpower, he'd have made it to Undella Town in record time. But he wanted to respect N's wishes so he was taking it slow. Very, _very_ slow.

Touya was crossing Route 4, the road right there as one exited Castelia City. The sandstorms were as bad as ever but Touya could see that the workers were making some real progress on the development despite the sand piles. Touya still had to watch out for the deeper patches though; some were deep enough he sank in to nearly his knees. He noticed some trainers wandering around a good distance from him and he decided it was probably better to not engage them in battle. He walked a little further, bracing against the strong sandy winds when his Xtransreceiver started ringing.

Touya's heart started pounding as he heard the little ding ding of the receiver. He quickly answered it and his face promptly fell when he saw who it was.

"Oh…it's just you…" Touya sighed.

"What do you mean 'it's just me?!'" replied a disgruntled Cheren. "Were you expecting someone else?"

"Hmm…maybe…" Touya fidgeted a little as Cheren huffed.

"Well excuse me! Hey, where are you right now?"

"Huh? Umm…Route 4. I'm headed towards Nimbasa."

Cheren made a noise on the other end of the receiver. "That's perfect actually. I'm in Nimbasa myself. Why don't you come meet me at the ferris wheel?"

"Huh? But I was-,"

"It's settled then! I'll see you in a half hour!"

The Xtransreceiver clicked off abruptly and with it Cheren's smug face. Touya's eyebrow twitched and he sighed. That Cheren…always so quick to drag him into something without so much as a quip against it. He put his receiver back in his bag and continued walking. The sand was gone, replaced with asphalt road. Touya passed under the raised highway bridge just as a large semi rumbled overhead, rattling sand loose and raining it down on his head. He made a sprint for Nimbasa's city gate and dashed inside, glad to finally be out of that. He was going to be pouring sand out of his clothes and shoes for days after this, he was sure of it.

He gave the bulletin board a quick glance before exiting into the brightly lit city of Nimbasa. Touya'd been here on several occasions, mostly to either ride the Battle Subway or to enjoy the amusement park. The park was near half of Nimbasa itself and was located a short distance from the southern city gate. Touya shook some more sand from his hat and headed in that direction. It wasn't hard to miss, as the ferris wheel stood several stories taller than some of the skyscrapers in the city.

The amusement park was a free attraction, as revenue from other businesses in the city paid for its upkeep. Touya walked under the bright flashing signs of the front gate and looked around. It was crowded, like it always was but seemed a bit more packed that usual. He spotted Cheren standing by the ferris wheel's gondola booth. He had to really fight his way through to the ferris wheel.

"Finally!" Cheren said impatiently, clicking his Xtransreceiver shut. "I was just about to call you again."

Touya sighed, scratching the back of his head. "I was coming! Geez, you're so impatient!"

Cheren made one of his faces and crossed his arms. "I am not impatient!"

Touya rolled his eyes. "Yeah whatever man. Did you want something from me? I was kinda just gonna to pass on through."

"What's the matter? Don't have time to spare for your childhood friend?" Cheren asked. His eyes narrowed suspiciously behind his glasses. "You got a date or something?"

"W-what, no of course not!" Touya's answer was a little too quick and the flush on his face gave him away. Cheren's eyes narrowed further.

"That so?" He looked up at the ferris wheel then back at Touya. He jerked his head towards it. "Come on, let's ride it. They're about to start another go around."

Cheren grabbed Touya's arms and against his protests pulled him into a gondola and shut the door. The engine rattled to life and the great round arms started moving. Touya quickly took his seat as the gondola started swinging in motion with the wheel. Cheren sat opposite him on the other bench, to even the weight out. That's probably why they only let you ride if you've got someone else with you.

As the gondola started to rise and Nimbasa began to shrink, Touya stared out the large window. His thoughts drifted in and out with the gentle swing of the car and inevitably were drawn back to the first time he ever rode the ride. His first ride on the ferris wheel was with N…and he'd dropped some heavy news on him. That's when Touya'd found out N was leader of Team Plasma and that they were enemies. But that was also the time when Touya'd found he'd been entranced by the enigmatic young man. He couldn't stop thinking about him. Hell even now he couldn't wander somewhere and it not remind him of N. It just made it all the harder to be away from him.

"-oya! Touya!" Cheren's sharp voice cut through Touya's memories and he snapped to attention.

"Huh? What?"

"Geez, what is wrong with you? You've been acting weird since you got here. Is something going on?"

Touya shook his head and went to looking back out the window. "No…nothing is going on. I'm fine." He wasn't about to tell Cheren about N. He'd only jump down his throat over it. He could feel Cheren's eyes scrutinizing him, trying to pry out some little detail that would give him away. After a minute or two of silence Cheren spoke again.

"Is it about N?"

Touya started slightly at the mention of N's name and he quickly started to say no but caught himself. He blushed and turned away. Whelp that was it. He was done for now. But instead of scolding him, Cheren only sighed.

"I don't know what the deal is, but I honestly think N is a good guy."

Touya looked back at Cheren, surprised at his words. "How…can you say that? You've only met him a couple times."

Cheren groaned, eyebrows furrowed. "I know…but I just can't come to think of him as an enemy, you know? But the way he's going about things…it's wrong. People need Pokemon, Pokemon need people. It's as simple as that. I mean, even though the two are you are rivals, you seem to get along ok, right?"

"Yeah…I guess…" Touya turned back to the window. Oh how right Cheren was…but he didn't even know the half of it. Touya's relationship was much deeper than friendship. Ever since that confession in Chargestone Cave, things had changed so much.

The rest of the ride was quiet as the wheel completed its revolution. The two of them got off and back into the throng of people. Touya was ready to leave right then and there, but Cheren caught his shoulder and drew him back.

"Look," he said. "Whatever's going on, don't get too hung up on it, ok? Remember, we've got a job to do. Team Plasma can't be allowed to run amuck anymore and to stop them, we have to stop N."

Touya nodded half heartedly. Cheren's words hurt even though he didn't mean for them to. He gripped the strap of his bag as Cheren said goodbye and walked away. Touya stood alone at the entrance of the ferris wheel, feeling as though he might cry. Cheren was right. As much as Touya would have liked to deny it, he was right.

"Just…a little while longer…" Touya muttered to himself. "Let me indulge a little while longer…please…"


	3. Chapter 3

"My Lord N…" A subtle knock on the door jamb signaled the arrival of someone. N looked up what he was doing to see Anthea, pink hair spread out behind her.

"Yes? What is it?" N asked politely, cleverly tucking his project away underneath a pillow from her prying eyes. She didn't appear to notice and continued with her message.

"Lord Ghetsis wishes to speak with you," she stated flatly.

"What about?"

Anthea adjusted her shawl. "I do not know, only that he wanted to see you immediately."

N sighed and stood up. "I see. I will go talk with him right away." He gingerly stepped over the toys littering the floor and exited the room. He didn't get more than a few paces away when Anthea called him again.

"My Lord N…," she said. "If you'll pardon me, but lately you seem…different."

N looked back at her over his shoulder. "Different?"

Anthea nervously toyed with one of her bangs, unsure if she should continue. But N's inquisitive stare led her to comply. "Well yes, different. Like…how shall I put this? You seem…happier, like you've found something special."

"….is it that obvious?" N asked cautiously. He thought he'd been careful enough…

"But my Lord! Being happy is not something to be ashamed of!" Anthea protested. She blushed, suddenly remembering her place. She averted her eyes, picking at her hair again. "I mean…well…it's so nice…being able to see you happy again…"

She rocked on her heels, avoiding N's eye. "It makes me happy to see my Lord N happy, because you've been sad for far too long. Please…don't lose sight of what's important to you. You are young and full of life, my Lord. Even if you can't create the world you so long to see, remember those little things that bring you joy."

N smiled at her and she blushed again. It was rare for N to show that kind of emotion, especially in the castle or when Ghetsis was calling for him. His smile though was merely a cover for the pain stirring in his heart. Even though Anthea meant well, her words were cutting. He nodded at her, still smiling.

"Thank you, Anthea. I'll do well to remember that."

Xxxxxxxxxxx

_The looming spires of the museum tower over me as I stand before a trainer, one I have faced only once before. This trainer, this Touya, fights with the fires of compassion and fervor. His eyes are full of determination and yet are gentle and kind. Touya's Pokemon are fighting hard and I am troubled by what I am witnessing. Though they get hurt, their voices tell me that they are happy to fight for this trainer, the one whom they love so much. A pang of doubt strikes at my heart as I begin to feel a change inside me. His ideals are set, he knows his path. But do I really know mine?_

Xxxxxxxxxxx

N was not listening to Ghetsis as he rambled on and on in the castle's audience chamber. He'd heard his shpeal over and over again and frankly, he was a bit tired of it. He stared at the older man with blank eyes and an emotionless face. The words were just washing over him as he stood there taking the brunt of it.

His mind wandered back to that memory. Why had he suddenly remembered that particular moment? He thought on it for a bit. That was when…when he began to question things. He had never met Pokemon that likes humans, let alone love them. What made Touya different, he had wondered. What did he possess that his Pokemon would love him so much? N still hadn't figured it out exactly, but he had come to understand the world a bit better because of Touya. And now they were…

"N! Are you even listening to me?!" Ghetsis snapped. The older man had quit his pacing to give N a glare.

"Yes, I'm listening," N said. He knew Ghetsis' speeches by heart by now. "The grunts have begun to set up things in Opelucid City and in Icirrus City, you said."

Ghetsis nodded, appeased. "Yes, they're preparing for our next step. Have any of the other sages ever mentioned the legends of the origins of the Unova region?"

N had to stop himself from sighing. "Yes, many times over. There was a great hero who created Unova in the image of his truths and ideals using legendary dragons. I don't see why this is important right now. It hardly has anything to do with creating a world where Pokemon never have to be hurt by humans again."

Ghetsis stroked his chin, scoffing at N. "On the contrary, it has everything to do with your goal. We of Team Plasma have dedicated our efforts to finding ways for you to accomplish your dream. And from the information I have received, your dream may not be far off from becoming a reality."

N looked at Ghetsis with a scrutinizing eye. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that our scouts have found a way for you to realize your ideal world. Through great sacrifice, we have finally discovered what became of those legendary dragons."

Ghetsis suddenly reached out and put his hands on N's shoulders. The look in his eye was one of grave seriousness. "N! You must become the new hero of Unova and revive one of the legendary dragons! Then and only then will your, no, our dream come to fruition!"

"Become…a hero? But I don't know anything about-,"

"N, this is your destiny. This is what we of the Seven Sages have trained you for. You will become the new hero and lead Unova into a new age of prosperity and peace. But only if you accept your destiny will your dream become reality. Natural…my son, who bears our name of Harmonia…"

N found himself speechless at this revelation. Him…a hero? Is this why he could understand the Pokemon? Why he could see into their hearts and feel the pain they felt? N furrowed his brow, mind racing as he contemplated.

"If I…if I really become the hero…then the Pokemon will never suffer again, right?" N asked. His voice betrayed his innocence, his desire for the well being of all Pokemon.

Ghetsis nodded. "Yes. Become the hero and no one, Pokemon or humans alike will ever suffer again."

"Pokemon will be happy…if I become the hero? Even those who belong to trainers?"

"Pokemon are enslaved by trainers. They are abused and eventually abandoned. We are saving the Pokemon by taking them away from trainers. Pokemon will only be happy if they can live separated from humans. Don't tell me you've forgotten all those poor Pokemon that you grew up with?"

N shook his head. How could he forget? Their pain was so great they had sworn to never trust humans again. They had been abandoned, as Ghetsis said. N clenched his teeth. He'd made up his mind.

"I'll do it. For the Pokemon's sake."

Ghetsis smiled at him and released his grip. "You make me proud to hear you say that."

Xxxxxxxxxxx

_I have thought long and hard about my dreams, ever since meeting Touya. And here I am, facing him yet again with that same doubt in my heart. Why, I wonder? Why do I feel so strongly about him, why can I not stop thinking about him? The looks he gives me as he sits across from me on this ferris wheel are…unsettling. Every time our eyes meet, my heart begins to race. My face flushes when he gives a smile. I am his enemy…yet he treats me like a friend. So why?_

_Does he feel the same? Does he wonder like I do? Does he get scared when he experiences things he doesn't understand? I don't know…but deep down in my heart…I want him to. I want him…to feel what I feel. To understand me, just as I want to understand him. But will he? Will he merely brush me off as a passing thought or will he accept me? I'm scared to find out._

_The gondola creaks as it slowly rotates on its iron hinges. Words escape my lips but I don't know what they say. His face becomes surprised and then worried. But then he smiles and tells me that it's ok. He doesn't care who I am…only what I will do. His smile makes my heart skip. What is this feeling…?_

Xxxxxxxxxxx

N returned to his room after speaking with Ghetsis, feeling tired and emotionally drained. Asleep on a pile of pillows was a Zoura and a Darmantian. He looked at them and smiled. They were happy with him, they had said so many times over. But N could not be happy, as long as they were tied to him.

N sat down near the pillows and retrieved his little project. Ghetsis' request had been unsettling to say the least. How on earth was he supposed to be a hero of truths when he himself doubted those truths? N shook his head. No, he couldn't think like that! If he did then he would never be able to create his world. His thoughts wandered to Touya, who he was to be meeting in the next few days. His heart hurt just to think about him. He clenched his hand to his chest, eyes sad.

"Touya…" he whispered. Oh his poor poor Touya. What was to become of them, now when they had finally begun to understand each other and move towards achieving each other's dreams together?

N looked down at his project. It was a doll he was sewing, about the size of a small teddy bear in Touya's likeness. He suddenly got an idea and realization spread across his face.

"Yes…that's it…that's it!" N started sewing again, stitching up the Touya doll's body. "We can still realize our dreams…together…Touya…"


End file.
